The Polish Book of Karma

By William Missouri Downs

Script

Downs@uwyo.edu

Character Breakdown:

Jerzy Pogozelski - A Protestant hat salesman - 50s

Rosy Pogselski - A Catholic housewife – 50s

Loretta Coors - A Harvard student – 20s

Langdon Kennedy - A handsome Harvard law student – 20s

Father Ramona - A Celibate – Late 20s

Synopsis:

Harvard student Loretta Pogozelski is convinced she’s adopted. She grew up in Jackowo, which is known as the “Polish Village” of Chicago. Jerzy, her father, is a protestant hat salesman who’s convinced that the phrase “Carpe Denim” has to do with fishing. Rosy, her mother, is an Irish Catholic housewife who believes one of the books of the Bible is called Karma. Fifty-three percent of Americans didn’t read a book last year – Jerzy and Rosy were two of them.

When Loretta left Chicago to attend “Godless, liberal Harvard” Jerzy and Rosy warned that she’d return an “atheist, communist and pregnant.” They were right – two out of three. But Loretta’s problems run deeper for she’s fallen in love with a refined Cambridge law student (a Kennedy no less) who thinks her last name is Coors, not Pogozelski; a name Loretta thinks belongs on the side of a plumber’s truck.

When both the Pope and her Cambridge lover arrive in Chicago on the same day, Loretta must deal with her pregnancy, her fading beliefs, as well as her polished boyfriend and Polish family.

The difference between them couldn’t be more profound. Loretta’s boyfriend loves yachting, while Loretta’s parents never let her near the water - Rosy told her chlorine caused skepticism. Her boyfriend takes her to the Opera while her family attends Cats on Ice. Stuck in the middle of this conflict is Father Ramona a young priest who must save Loretta’s unborn child, bring the lovers back together and take everyone’s confession before the Pope leaves for Italy.

In short, The Polish Book of Karma is a comedy for anyone who has ever hoped they might be adopted.